Na+, K+, Ca2+, Mg2+, Cl−, HPO42−, HCO3−

Dear Donald Cramp,

I'm in the middle of a crisis, so I have to tighten up my budget right now. I can't afford to buy myself a Gatorade and/or a Pocari Sweat every now and then just so I can avoid you. Please don't attack too often especially when I'm just stretching after waking up from sleep. Neither when I'm playing soccer (which is rare now), or biking and when swimming.. oh never ever when I'm on the water!!

Very Respectfully,

P.S. I'm not sure about all this though, because I'm no doctor.